Unlocking Harmony: Exploring the 5 Benefits of Divorce Mediation
Divorce is a challenging journey, often fraught with emotional turmoil and legal complexities. Traditional adversarial divorce proceedings can exacerbate tensions and drain resources, leaving both parties feeling exhausted and embittered. However, an alternative...
How to get the most out of your Therapy Appointments
I wish all therapy appointments were created equal. This would make life a little more straightforward… Something like, “Come to 4 sessions. And. Poof! Everything will be fixed.” It’s not that easy though. This got me to thinking, “how can our patients get the most...
Myth or Fact: You have to maintain toxic family relationships
Myth: You have to maintain a relationship with family members, even if they are toxic. Fact: You have a choice. Relationships are complicated, especially those with family. Many people receive the message, whether it is implied or said outright, that you have to...
Emotional Availability – one of the benefits of talk therapy
We’ve all heard the term “emotionally unavailable”. Whether it’s a relationship excuse, an observation of others, or a self admitted problem, it’s a real thing. People who are emotionally unavailable tend to make excuses for their behavior instead of owning it. They...
Financial Trauma
I have felt the “stuckness” deeply in my bones for years. Mine has been two-fold. Mostly my marriage and my personal finances. From a Marriage and Family Therapist and a Business Owner- We are human too. I have sought...
Non-Pharmacological treatment for ADHD
Svitlana Volos - EMDR Specialist at Balance Stress Management and Therapy ADHD/ADD is now the most frequently diagnosed childhood mental health and behavior disorder with an estimated 11% of American school-aged children (and nearly 20% of all high school boys)...
Breaking the Stigma of Therapy
As a Licensed Professional Counselor, I have heard many reasons for why individuals do not want to see a therapist, such as, “I am a man, I am not supposed to talk about my problems,” “It is a waste of money,” “I am not crazy,” “I can talk to my friends about my...
6 Ways For Overcoming Defeat
With the changing of the seasons, and life’s curve balls, sometimes its easy to feel defeated. Perhaps, you haven’t even realized it’s gotten that bad, but you know something is just “off.” This happens to everyone. Don’t feel bad. Don’t think you’re alone. In fact,...
Spring Decluttering
Balance Team Outing - March 2019 Spring is HERE! Finally. What happens in the Chicago area? You see jackets on the blacktop at schools. Your daughter asks if she can wear shorts! Remember when you were a kid and you wanted to wear SHORTS as early as humanly possible?...
Self Care – The Power of Recharging Your Batteries
I think it’s commonly understood that we need to recharge our batteries. But, many of us view this as selfish and don’t do it. We prioritize others’ needs, responsibilities of life, and the demands our families and careers over ourselves. But, there’s a lot of power...
Why is the waitstaff in Mexico so SLOW?
I just spent some time in this beautiful beach town in Tulum, Mexico. The first day I got to TuIum, I was tired from a 5am flight. By the time I got to my hotel I was STARVING and had not had enough coffee- coffee is life. And I arrived at my destination...
Tips for Loving Yourself
With February upon us, many are thinking about Valentine's Day and spending it with that special someone. Or, maybe you're single this year and this holiday is more of a single's awareness day. Either way, you should be more focused on loving yourself. That's where...
The Therapeutic Qualities of Coloring
Adult coloring books have become a popular hobby taken on by many individuals around the world. Although this hobby may have started as a pleasurable way to pass time, research has shown that coloring could be quite therapeutic. Coloring has an effect on physiological...
The Road to Self-Acceptance
Have you ever had a part of you that you did not like? This “part” being some aspect that might include a pattern of thoughts, feelings, or behaviors. Maybe this looks like anger, anxiety, sadness, self-criticism, jealousy, insecurity, depression, or your self-image....
Getting Out of that Funk
I imagine every one has been in a funk sometime in their life….or maybe at least once a week!! Maybe even every day for awhile. It seems like nothing you do works out the way you want it too, and just when you think one more rotten thing can’t happen it does....
Want to Boost your Creativity and Productivity, Try these Paint Colors!
It’s no secret that color can seriously affect your mood (we’ve previously explored how it can make you happier in your home, and highlighted the psychological merits of ROYGBV), but there are two colors in particular that can stimulate your creativity and...
Tips for Creating a Mindful Home
Mindfulness is being embraced everywhere these days, from the Kindergarten classroom to company retreats. What is mindfulness, exactly? Susan Smalley, Ph.D., and Diana Winston, co-authors of Fully Present, say that mindfulness is “an accepting and kind attitude toward...
The Ten Commandments for a Clutter Free Life
Live within your means This isn’t a new idea, but I think it’s a wonderful place to start if you’re aiming for a simpler, less cluttered life. What “live within your means” implies for your home is this: Let the size of your home dictate how much stuff you have, and...
Managing Holiday Stress
Ah, the holidays! For many of us ‘tis the season for family, friends, and fun. Holiday parties and other events that bring joy and connectedness. However, for others the holidays are a time of stress coupled with a desire to simply “get through it.” Hosting...
How We See The Problem, May Be the Problem
My focus in writing this post is to take a very brief look at how we look at ourselves and our problems. Awareness and seeing with our mind’s eye, or perception, can be seen as two-fold, in my opinion, when it comes to therapy and counseling. There exists the...
Abortion, Miscarriage, and Traumatic Stress
For women, a common experience that occurs that can lead to traumatic stress symptoms are both abortions and miscarriages. Although these experiences may seem entirely different at a glance; from an attachment perspective, they are highly similar for the following...
Relaxation Music: a Creative Catalyst for Balanced Wellness
When clients walk through the door for music therapy at Balance Stress Management and Therapy they can expect a personalized experience from their very first visit. Our board certified music therapist surveys each client’s unique preferences in music in order to...
Help with Executive Functioning
Imagine that you are stuck on an escalator. You don’t know what to do. You have no Plan B. You can’t be flexible and think of how to overcome this problem. Now imagine that you are in a classroom. The teacher calls for homework to be turned in, however, you can’t...
A Dozen Signs that Your Relationship May Be Wrong for You
It’s not easy to stay in a relationship even when you know deep down it’s not going to last. In the beginning, you look beyond your differences and the relationship’s shortcomings, holding out hope that things will change with time. Later, when you’ve been with your...
From a Guy’s Perspective
To say that men are different than women is just too obvious. Fact is that there are also some subtle differences. It is my contention that men are often missing out by not engaging in therapy to address issues of inadequacy, feelings of guilt, wanderlust, and not...
Balanced Lifestyle – Secrets
Secrets don’t serve us, they engross us in the flames of anxiety, depression, and mask-wearing. Secrets protect sometimes but they also hurt your soul. So what is the Balance between keeping some things private by keeping your secrets, and letting the flag fly?...
Learning the Language of the Body
When you think of mental health, what do you think of? Many associate mental health with thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. But do you know that your mental health can have a significant impact on your physical health? While some of the commonly listed symptoms of...
Being an LGBTQ Ally
Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning (LGBTQ) people want to be treated equally just as others do. One third of non-LGBTQ Americans say they are uncomfortable seeing same-sex couples even holding hands. This number has decreased over time but one third...
Battling the Internal War with DBT
Have you ever struggled with having really strong emotions, and not knowing what to do with them? Or maybe you find yourself acting in ways that you regret because you wanted so badly to feel better that you did the first thing that came to mind and later realized it...
Coping with a Loved One’s Addiction
Coping with a loved one’s addiction is not easy. Addiction affects not only the person who is using, but often others around them. There may be lies and arguments. There may be late nights wondering when they’ll come home or if they are safe. Or perhaps none of...
The Power of Positive Thinking
Imagine this: You are heading to work for the day and are stuck in traffic due to an accident up ahead. A common human response may sound something like, “Ugh! I have places to be! This is just my luck! I’m going to be late!” Furthermore, we may notice more tension in...
“I Love You the Way That You Are”
Amy Schillinger, Clinical Director and owner of Balance Stress Management and Therapy in Elgin, IL I worked (and had since February of this 2011) in a private practice in Silicon Valley. I am from a college/farming community in Illinois and moved out to California for...
Communicating with Your Teenager
Most teenagers struggle with communicating with their parents because they are usually on their phones or computers talking to friends. Parents of teenagers usually hear responses like: “Mhm,” or “Sure,” or the teen favorite “Whatever,” or the parents simply get...
The Purpose Behind the Pain: Understanding Self – Injury
While the idea of using pain in order to provide a sense of relief might sound counter-intuitive, all behavior serves a purpose. Self-injury has been defined as the act of deliberately inflicting harm on oneself without the intention of dying. Statistics show that...
Depression and Neurofeedback
According to Scientific American one in six U.S. adults reported taking a psychiatric drug, such as an antidepressant or a sedative (data comes from an analysis of the 2013 Medical Expenditure Panel Survey). Antidepressants were the most common type of psychiatric...
Life S.A.V.E.R.S.
The idea of Life S.A.V.E.R.S. is not my own, but borrowed from the author of The Miracle Morning, Hal Elrod (link provided at end of document). In his book, Elrod talks about the dark place from which he came. A place of disability after a devastating accident, a...
Occupational Therapy: ADD/ADHD, Sensory Processing Disorder or Both?
As an Occupational Therapist working in Pediatrics over the years I have often heard a very common question, “Is what I’m noticing in my child ADD, Sensory Processing Disorder…or both?”. Parents find themselves scratching their heads trying to determine the root cause...
Maneuvering the Big (College) Transition
The summer before college can be one of the most carefree, exhilarating times for incoming freshman. It’s a time where reality hits pause as friends try to soak up their last remaining months with one another before being catapulted into their next big journey in...
Why do we automatically go to that place where we think others’ behaviors reflect our worth?
Someone cuts you off while driving on the highway. You get mad. Why? Because you received some message in your mind that reinforces a negative thought you hold about yourself. Every SINGLE individual (at least all the hundreds I’ve encountered) have a NASTY belief...
A Multimodal Approach for Treating Children with Pediatric Mental Health Issues – The Behavioral Aspect
At Balance – Stress Management and Therapy, we are developing a multimodal treatment package specifically for children that are diagnosed with a wide range of issues, including ADHD, depression, anxiety, autism spectrum disorder (ASD), sensory processing disorder, and...
Life Encounters: Attachment and how we Grow a Sense of Self
Have you ever wondered if there was something “Wrong” with you, with the way you think and the feelings you have? NEWS FLASH!!! There is nothing WRONG about you, however you are a product of your life experiences. Human beings are complex and the development of our...
A Brief Glimpse of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
The field of therapy is grounded in many different approaches, therapeutic models, and theories. Not one specific theory or model is going to work for each unique individual, couple, or family, so I find it useful to adapt to each client and work from an approach that...
Are you in a Narcissistic Relationship?
When you think about your current romantic relationship, do you ever feel: Abandoned by friends or family? Almost as if your significant other is the only one who cares? Made to feel guilty when you tried to socialize with others? Worthless, or that your mistakes...
What is Reiki?
Reiki comes from the Japanese words Rei and Ki. A translation of the word Rei can be understood as Higher Power or God Wisdom. Ki can be understood as life force energy. Combined we understand Reiki as spiritual guidance of life force energy. Reiki uses the life force...
An Introduction to Music Therapy
Have you ever been driving along in your car and on the radio you hear a song that suddenly pulls your mind in an unexpected direction? A feeling or a memory pops into your head because of a song you hear in passing? Have you ever found yourself tapping your toes to...
A Multimodal Approach for Treating Children with ADHD – The Behavioral Aspect
At Balance Stress Management and Therapy, we are developing a multimodal treatment package specifically for children that are diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and/or for children who exhibit symptoms of ADHD, anxiety, and depression. The...
Putting Ourselves First through Self-Care
Life these days can seem like we are constantly at a green light, going and going until we feel like the only way to stop is to crash and burn. This mentality can take a toll on us physically and mentally. For example, living life in the fast lane may cause us to lose...
Occupational Therapy & Developmental Milestones
Before we dive into what developmental milestones are, we should probably start by addressing the first and most common question I get asked. “What is Occupational Therapy, anyway?” If you’re like most people you’ve probably asked yourself this when hearing about the...
Help! My Child is Only Average!
The new norm is not the 50th percentile; well, what does that mean? According to this theoretical bell curve, 68% of the population falls between the -1 SD and the +1 SD of the mean score. The mean score would be the score that is the average score, the score that 50%...
ADHD and Neurofeedback
According to the latest report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention ADHD is the most frequently diagnosed pediatric behavioral health disorder. 11 % of American school-aged children (and nearly 20% of all high school boys) have been medically diagnosed...
Abortion, Miscarriage, & Traumatic Stress
For women, a common experience that occurs that can lead to traumatic stress symptoms are both abortions and miscarriages. Although these experiences may seem entirely different at a glance; from an attachment perspective, they are highly similar for the following...
Brief Overview of Dialectical Behavior Therapy
What is D.B.T.? D.B.T. or Dialectical Behavior Therapy has been proven to be effective in helping people manage thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Many people are born with emotions that run high, others experience neglect or trauma at a critical time in their...
Giving Thoughts a Creative Outlet
Have you wondered whether you might use creativity to express your reality? If so, SoulCollage® might be for you. SoulCollage® is a soul-satisfying process where you create a personal deck of collaged cards that contains three transpersonal cards and four suits. The...
Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy
Regardless if a couple has been in a relationship for two years, or in a marriage for sixteen years, it is likely that they will get caught up in a negative interaction cycle of some sort. The cycle can take various forms, and it will repeat itself whenever both...
To-Do with Love
Unread emails, dreaded phone calls to return, unwashed dishes in the sink, broken dishwasher, no food left in the fridge, overflowing laundry basket, dirty car, bills to pay, pushed back gym session, unopened books I wanted to read months ago, medical records to...
Safe Online Dating Practices
Dating in the modern age has transformed regarding the way in which people are meeting their partners. While meeting potential romantic partners through mutual friends ranks as the number one form of matchmaking, online dating has grown significantly in popularity to...
Winter takes it’s Toll, More than the “Winter Blues”
How many of you are not the biggest fan of Winter in the Midwest? Show of hands? Did you know that there’s a name for that? Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a type of depression that’s related to changes in seasons